New Start

Tomorrow, I start my second semester. It is exciting in a new way. I kind of know what to expect now, now that I've got one semester under my belt. The last two-and-a-half weeks of the previous semester is not something I want to repeat this time around. I vow to keep up with my work and not leave all my final papers til the last minute. I found out that one of my classes has a 30-page paper due. At least it's due a month earlier than most finals, if that is any consolation. But given the craziness I endured last semester, I'm very pleased with my performance. I've never seen grades that high next to my name and the letters "GPA". Horray for God's awesome faithfulness.

Recently, I finished Randy Pausch's book, "The Last Lecture" and watched the last lecture he delivered at Carnegie Mellon University where he had been an associate professor of computer science. If you've never heard of him, Randy Pausch was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, a type of cancer in which less than 10% of those diagnosed live past six months. With less than six months of good health left, he went on to deliver a poignant lecture that touched the hearts of those in the room and beyond. If you have not listened to that lecture and/or read the book, I strongly urge you to do so. They will surely not disappoint.

The book/lecture got me thinking about some stuff. Often times, good books and/or talks will do that to you. Here was a man diagnosed with one of the most severe forms of cancer there is and he's so optimistic on life. Yes, he is deeply saddened by the fact that he will soon leave his wife by herself to rear three children who will never fully know who their dad was. But he does not live with bitterness and a woe-is-me attitude. He does not play the victim. He says in his lecture, "That is what it is. We can't change it. We just have to decide how we'll respond. We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand." And he played it as best as he knew how.

There are so many life lessons I got out of this short little book at first reading. I'm definitely planning on going back and re-reading it. I believe it has valuable lessons of what it means to be a person. But the one lesson I want to focus on today is the power of attitude. I look at myself and I see someone different from this Randy Pausch person. I get one parking ticket, one paper cut, one lousy grade, one missed lunch, and I get all bent out of shape. Here is a man who's been sentenced to death, and he lives happily and fully to his bestest abilities. There is something wildly attractive about that. Sometimes I fool myself into believing the lie that I cannot change who I am. I'm a pessimist, a half-empty kind of guy. But that doesn't mean I need to stay that way. I want to be optimistic on life. I want to be able to live a full life where even if something doesn't go the way I would hope, I can still move on quickly to bigger and better things.

That is what I'm going to try to do this new year. I don't necessarily believe in new years resolutions. But I want to try something new. I want to remain as upbeat as possible no matter what may come.